


Smiling Through The Pain!

by TheFandomIdjit



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, F/M, Sick Character, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-01
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-11-21 22:57:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11367369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFandomIdjit/pseuds/TheFandomIdjit
Summary: Harry Potter is uncurably sick and he decides to keep it a secret as he wants to live his life as normal as possible before the cancer takes him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a muggle illness. 
> 
> Trigger warning: contains cancer which may be troubling to some readers.

Harry walked beside Albus Dumbledore smiling as he talked about Harry protecting himself.

If only you knew you probably wouldn't bother with me anymore. But Harry remained silent keeping his secret buried within.

When Albus had talked to his aunt and uncle he had been worried they might accidentally tell him what Harry had kept silent all summer and planned to keep silent until the end.

He took Albus's hand and allowed him to appariate with him to a very best up looking house.

Harry watched with heart beating as Albus inspected each item in the house before thrusting a wand into the upholstery of an arm chair.

To Harry's amazement the armchair turned into a man a very fat portly looking man. He watched with amusement as he explained his actions to Albus and finally Albus reached the reason behind why they were there.

As soon as Mr. Slughorn said no, Albus had grabbed a quilting magazine and disappeared into the bathroom leaving Harry to sit awkwardly alone with this man who started a conversation with him.

He talked about Harry's mother, and Sirius not realizing how much it made him jolt at the name because of the incident last year. Between the conversation Harry had pulled out a handkerchief and coughed horribly into it. When he pulled the handkerchief away blood coated the cloth.

Harry seeing Slughorn’s questioning eyes on it hastily put it away.

Thankfully Albus returned before Slughorn's could ask too many questions.

After the visit Albus took him to the burrow he was a bit worried as to wither he'd be able to keep his secret in such a place as there would be Weasley in every corner to know when he coughed and would notice his lack of appetite or excessive weight loss.

But before taking him in Albus pulled him into a broom shed full of spiders and started congratulating him on how well he had taken the loss of Sirius, then told him about taking special lessons with him.

Now Harry was double worried Dumbledore was extremely observant and would spot a problem a mile away. What if he coughed in front of him? Or he noticed any other differences?

Harry just smiled a bit at Albus as he now led him up to the house where they discovered Tonks leaving the burrow.

They exchanged friendly hellos before Molly waved him and Albus in.

Another wave of a shaking cough left his chest but he tried to shrug it off pretending it was nothing.But apparently Molly and Albus were too busy talking to have noticed it.

When Albus was gone a bowl of soup was placed on the table for Harry and was bidden to eat. Looking at the soup with zero appetite he picked up the bowl and sipped it slowly more to keep from hurting Molly's feelings than anything else.

When he was finished he disappeared to the room Molly he set aside for him before another shaky cough could escape in front of Molly.

Laying across the bed he stretched out and curled on himself as the memory of what the doctor his aunt and uncle had taken him to had told him…

_Harry had been at the breakfast table trying to eat a grapefruit when the fruit had slipped from his suddenly weakened fingers._

_His uncle had been yelling at him for a few minutes before Harry’s nose had started bleeding and Harry had promptly passed out onto the floor._

_His aunt's scream was the last thing he heard before waking up in a bed hooked to a ton of machines, some leading into his arms and legs while some lead to his chest._

_A needle was stuck deep into his left arm pumping something into him and a doctor stood at the foot of his bed talking to the Dursleys._

_“Sir, your nephew's health is very critical he has the worst case of cancer I have ever seen he needs to be treated right away it won't cure him, as I'm afraid the advanced stage of it makes it incurable but we can at least lengthen his life by a few more years. Without treatment he may if he's lucky make it two years but only if he's very lucky and it doesn't progress further but even so he is a very sick teen boy and the prognosis is clear with or without treatment he will eventually die from this.”_

_Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing he had cancer and it was going to kill him. And he didn't need to hear what his uncle would say as he already knew his uncle would never pay such money for him especially if it wasn't going to do much good for him and inwardly he was glad._

_He interrupted the conversation not giving Vernon a chance to respond._

_“No sir, I don't want it, I don't want to spend the rest of what life I have hooked to a bunch of machines, I'd prefer to spend it going to my boarding school and be with my best friends when my time finally comes I want to live my life as normally as possible and die in peace without the machines.”_

_Aunt Petunia looked at him with tears and Harry realized she had been about to insist on Vernon paying for him, but seeing that Harry didn't want it at all had accepted the decision._

_The cancer has slowly gotten worse through the months while he waited for someone to come get him and take him to the place where he felt happy and at home._  

He soon fell into an exhausted sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Harry was woken up by Ron and Hermione, and though he was tired he hadn't the heart to be upset with them.

Instead he sat up and reached clumsily for his glasses before putting them on his face.

“You shouldn't have hit him Ron.” Hermione told Ron in a tone of disapproval.

But Ron was sitting on his bed “So Harry you got to apperiate with Dumbledore, what was it like?”

Harry shrugged and slowly told them all about the journey with Dumbledore to this Horace Slughorn guy, the conversation he had had with him, and then told them about what was said in Ron’s shed about the special lessons.

“Wow you're so lucky, you get to learn from Dumbledore himself.” Hermione groaned a bit jealously.

Harry just smiled, trying to ignore the pain going through his body, he couldn't have them finding out why he wasn't so lucky at all.

No he wanted his last moments with his friends to be something that would create memories for them, he wanted them to remember good things not anticipate his death the rest of his entire life.

Harry knew that I was probably wrong to keep something so big from them but he just couldn't bring himself to tell them he knew they would smother him in pity and he just didn't want that, he wanted it to be as normal as it could be possible with Voldemort around.

Harry ate a bite of eggs before giving the rest to Ron and Hermione.

“No offense to your mother, I'm, I'm just not hungry currently, I'll make up for it later.” He told them when Hermione looked t him suspiciously.

They just shrugged and picked off Harry's plate until Hermione poking through boxes accidentally punched herself in the face with one of Fred and George's inventions.

Almost crying she had disappeared down the stairs to check and see if their owls had arrived yet.

But when she didn't come back Ron and Harry went down to check on things to find Hermione on a stool and Molly busy trying to fix Hermione's eye.

Harry was feeling real tired all the way to his bones so he slid into a nearby chair and tried to keep up a smile.

Harry fought back a yawn getting a glance from Molly.

“You were up rather late last night weren't you? If you want a nap before Remus and the others arrive it's okay.” Molly offered.

“No, no I'm fine, I'd rather go to bed at the proper time other wise I won't sleep tonight.” He smiled.

“I suppose you're right keeping up a good schedule is very important.”

Just then owls appeared carrying envelopes that were quite a bit thicker than usual. Upon opening them Harry discovered that he had been sent a badge, he was going to be a Gryffindor Keeper, but other than this their owls had been sent in along with their regular shopping list.

“I suppose we can't be putting off Diagon Alley to much longer that that you got those.” Molly sighed as everyone read over there mail.

Harry was looking at his owls not really feeling as disappointed as he thought he'd be. What good were grades if he couldn't enjoy a career later? He wondered. 

Putting it back on the table he turned his attention to the door where Remus and the others had appeared.

“Hey, Harry, happy birthday.” Remus greeted softly squeezing his shoulders causing Harry to wince a bit but he disguised it rather well.

Mad Eye came in and gave Harry a grin as a greeting and sat at the table.

The only other visitor was Kingsley Shacklebolt.

Molly served finger sandwiches and the biggest cake Harry had ever seen, making Harry feel a bit guilty for not telling them all what was coming.

Telling himself it was for the best he tried to get into the mood of the thing trying not to think about the fact it could be one of the last he'd ever celebrate.


	3. Chapter 3

“Harry, is something bothering you?” Mad Eye Moody asked concerned as everyone had been talking.

Everybody's attention had been on a conversation earlier away from Harry and he had slumped in his chair, pain coursing through his body.

“No, no I'm just fine, just a bit tired is all I had a long night yesterday.” He lied.

Mad eye’s magical eye was fixated on him as if looking for the fib but apparently decided not to pursue it as he fell back into the conversation with Mr. And Mrs. Weasley about things in war against Voldemort.

Harry stayed slumped in his chair exhaustion taking its toll on him but not wanting to go to bed yet, he wanted to spend as much time with his friends each day as possible as one day they would no longer have him around.

But the time came when Harry could take it no longer.

A yawn escaped Harry.

“Thank you for the cake and it was nice seeing you guys today but I'm bushed and headed to bed.” Harry explained standing him knowing it was time to take a leave of absence.

Every else just nodded and dismissed him none of them at all aware anything was wrong.

But when Harry got to Fred’s room his nose started bleeding and once again he couldn't suppress the shaking cough that he'd been trying his best to hold back all night.

Sticking tissues up his nose he lay upon the bed and stared at the ceiling trying to figure out how to sleep around the pain coursing through his body.

But reading his history of magic book he managed to bore himself to sleep.

It was the day before school would start before they finally made their way to Diagon Alley to buy their supplies.

When they were finished Molly had caved and agreed to stop and check out Weasley’s Wizards Wheezes shop.

Harry ducked behind a case as he pulled out a handkerchief to cough as usual. Try as he might to hide his illness his health had been declining more and more with each day that went by, and now he was severely weak to the point that he couldn't really move very fast and had developed the shakes as if cold.

That was when he spotted something odd, Draco Malfoy wandering off somewhere alone.

Quickly snagging Ron and Hermione's attention he convinced them to join him as they darted under Harry's invisibility cloak to follow and spy upon the blond that like making Harry's life miserable.

They soon overheard him trying to buy something at Borgin and Burke's threatening the man to make him promise not to sell whatever it was, saying something about somebody called Greyback.

When it was over Harry quickly decided that Malfoy was now a death eater like his father.

But neither Ron or Hermione wanted to believe him and promptly started giving what they felt were reasons on why he had been wrong.

By the time they had returned, they discovered that they had been missed the entire time and they tried their best to convince them that they had been their the entire time.

But finally the time came to head back to the burrow and get ready for the trip to Kings Cross so that they could return to Hogwarts.

Harry worked on packing his things but nearly cursed as his weakened fingers found it difficult to grip the suitcase that felt heavier to him than in the past.

Glancing around he was rather glad when he saw nobody had currently noticed.

Pretending It never happened Harry lifted the suitcase once more and carried it down to be loaded into the car.


	4. Chapter 4

On board the Hogwarts Express Harry tried to choose a compartment to himself in case his body gave him away but Neville and Luna managed to sit with him until a letter from Slughorn called him away for lunch.

Seeing it would be impolite to refuse he stood and went in search of the compartment where Slughorn was having the lunch.

To his surprise he saw Ginny sitting with them.

Harry blushed slightly as he secretly had feelings for her but now with a wistful thought he knew he'd never be able to act on it, Ginny deserved better than a boy that was dated to die.

He just smiled and tried his best to get through the lunch which he realized was a club for students Slughorn thought was interesting or related to somebody famous.

When the lunch was over Harry was just passing by Draco's compartment when an idea hit him.

Throwing on his invisibility cloak he slow and weakly followed Blaise Zabini to the compartment he shared with Malfoy.

Looking around he took a chance and climbed up into the luggage rack and listened as Draco and Pansy argued and fussed about schooling.

But it soon became apparent that Draco wasn't going to spill any goods really but there was no way for him to leave without being caught so he waited with weak baited breath.

But when the train stopped and everyone was leaving Malfoy waved everyone a head.

Closing the door Draco turned suddenly he slammed a bag into his head causing Harry to fall out of the compartment and hit his head on the floor as well.

“Patrificus Tortalas!” the spell caused Harry to be immobile. 

Harry felt excruciating pain as Draco stomped on his face.

“That was for my father Potter.” He sneered.

Covering him with the invisibility cloak he quickly exited the train.

Harry lay unable to move or call out as the train began to already move.

“Finete.” a familiar female voice rang.

Harry felt the spell lifted from him.

But he was weak, he had lost a lot of blood to his nose, and his had was pounding horribly bad.

But at the prompting of Tonks he jumped from the train before slowly following her .

“How'd you get in such a predicament?” Tonks inquired.

Harry explained only that Malfoy had attacked him but not to much detail.

“If you want I can fix that nose of yours.” Tonks offered.

Harry was nervous about it as the last one to magically heal a bone for him had managed to remove the bones completely resulting in him regrowing them painfully with magic.

But when it was done his nose was as good as new.

Tonks stopped as a figure came out to meet them.

Harry was shivering badly in pain and chills as his head pounded horribly Harry knew even as he watched Snape sneer at Tonks that something was wrong.

Something was wrong with his head.

But after Tonks left Snape bullied him the whole rest of the way. Feeling so badly Harry ignored it as he tried to concentrate on walking.

His vision went black and white as he walked beside Snape but before they reached the door to Hogwarts Harry's body gave out and he promptly passed out nose bleeding faster than ever.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry woke up in the hospital wing still feeling terrible Madam Pomfrey was standing over him with worried expression. 

Snape stood by the bed waiting for a diagnosis.

“Well I have found the issue he..” 

“Madam Pomfrey can I talk to you about something? It's kinda personal.” Harry interrupted quickly heart pounding.

“Severus I'll have to ask you to give us a private moment?” 

Rolling his eyes he stepped outside.

“Now what is it dear?”

Harry looked at his hands “It's just I know I'm very ill but I'd rather nobody but us knew about it , not till I'm ready it’s just the illness will kill me eventually but when my time comes I want to be where I feel happy, and I want to enjoy as much of my last moments as possible if they knew Dumbledore might send me home, Hogwarts has always ever felt like a home, I don't want my last months to be miserable.” Harry explained.

“Well I do have a strict Patient/Mediwitch confidentiality policy I won't tell anyone unless you okay it but what shall I tell Snape the condition?”

Harry thought a moment “ you can say it was something small like a flu or fever maybe?” Harry suggested.

She nodded “But I do need to alert you to something, that bruise on your forehead suggests you bumped your head and apparently the blunt force of it may have caused your illness to progress more than before. Symptoms may begin to worsen, I'm not so sure you'll be able hide it long.” Pomfrey warned.

“It should give me long enough to be ready by the time this claims me I'll have told them.” He smiled.

“Well at least let me give you something for pain.” she insisted going for a bottle only to click her tongue regretfully “I'm sorry dear I appear to be out, until Severus gives me more I won't be able to give you any.”

“That's okay it's not that bad.” Harry shrugged.

“You're a brave kid Harry and you can come see me anytime you want even if it's just for support.” 

“I have a question How did I get such a muggle disease?” Harry asked.

“Harry, the disease you have is not the muggle kind, it's a very rare disease that's only found in one out of three generations and it's usually found in lines that came from strictly Pure-blood families, it is a consequence of constant Pure-blood inbreeding, but because it's so rare an illness we haven't yet created a cure for this, we call it the Purity Disease.”

“But I'm a half-blood.” Harry pointed out.

“Yes but your father was from a pure-blood family, and somewhere in the ancestral line there may have been some inbreeding causing this to happen to you.”

Harry nodded.

Snape rejoined them after she called him back.

“He should be just fine after some bed rest Mr. Potter apparently hit his head on the train and has a concussion.”

Harry rubbed the bruise on his forehead and lay back in his bed feeling exhausted.

Severus nodded “He didn't tell me he felt that badly.” 

“He may have not known it had caused such a serious problem.” Pomfrey explained.

Harry looked up at them.

“My head was pounding, but I didn't realize it had anything to do with my fall earlier.” Harry mumbled.

“Well Mr. Potter let's be grateful for Professor Snape's fast thinking for getting you here quickly before it caused any damage.” 

Pomfrey tucked Harry into his bed and smiled then sternly barked her orders “ Now i want you to rest, and Severus I will need you to leave and let him rest.”

Harry curled up in his bed and exhausted fell straight to sleep.


End file.
